Anybody out there struggling to be normal, please stop and question that…
Are we really here to be someone else's idea of who they think we should be? To conform, be standard, usual and typical as defined in the dictionary. To do what’s expected according to them…whoever they are? Personally I don’t think so. I believe that we are here to discover and create ourselves. And we do this by knowing, understanding, loving, honouring and embracing who we are. I feel we are here to connect to the very deepest parts of our-selves, others and the world around us.
I do not say this lightly and I have had many of my own struggles with “normal” in my life but I am happy to say I choose to keep leaving them behind. I have shed many skins burnt by the fires started by significant others. All layers put upon me in one way or another. What is normal for a child who has learned that there is no-one to trust, no sense of safety in their world? What is normal for a child who has been abandoned by those they need the most when they most need them? What is normal for a child who cannot open his or her mind to learning because day-to-day life feels like a matter of survival and nobody is helping her with that?
I struggled for a long time to know and care about me, to come to terms with a painful childhood and childhood abuse well into my adult life. This affected me in many profound ways, one of the most significant being that I had no idea who or how I could have ever been had that never happened to me…and I will never know, that I let go of a long time ago. Then I went within and found my out the other side.
I have discovered this…One of the greatest joys in my life is a deep sense of connection in my heart and spirit to all that I am because of all that I have been through. I have learned to walk with myself in my darkest hours in a way that paves my path forward with love and courage and lets the healing in. Sharing that journey and experience with others not only sets me free but others also.
So I will continue to live and share my truth, my story, I will continue to feel my feelings, think my thoughts…The good, the bad and the ugly, the beautiful, brave and scary, I will leave no parts of me behind for fear of being judged, I will not hide pieces of me away because others do not understand. Instead I will continue to embrace all of who I am, how I am and why I am…Me.
Choosing to live with an open mind and an open heart and to acknowledge the things that make us different, respect the diversity amongst us and the cherish the gifts of humanity that come in all kinds of packages. I will honour every part of me and encourage others to do the same, and I will never, ever be normal, no thankyou! Melanie Lee